DAY 1

Today is officially 'GAME ON'.  I did begin my workouts yesterday though... more on that later.

I have 25 people plus myself on this team.  It is overwhelming and exciting all at the same time.  All of this started with a whim and a very short email.  Now, we've had people talking all year about the start of team lean and sign up was no disappointment.  Im proud to be with these people.  To stand along side and call them my church family and Team In Focus.  Of course, I absolutely want us to win, but there is that voice in the back of my head that is telling me there is no way we will win two years in a row... I keep thinking I just need to pray for big things.  I dont want others disappointed if we don't come in first.  I want, first and foremost for people to feel good about themselves and get healthy.  I don't want to lose friends to preventable things (heart disease, diabetes, ect)  It will take a few weeks before we see what kind of team we are going to be, but I will tell you what I am praying for- THAT WE BRING IT!!  ;)

We are also in the beginning of a cooperate fast.  I have given up all bread, grains, and anything of the sort.  Fruit, veggies and meat all week.  You forget how much that encompasses until you go to pop a piece of cereal in your mouth that hit the counter while making your child's breakfast, or when you are putting crackers with their sandwich for lunch... Hello.  Im Nicole and Im a bread-aholic.  It is good though.  Im praying for my team, people individually, my church, my family and myself.  I needed this.  It was a long winter.

I started back with my boot campers at the Y yesterday.  It is a 6 week program that puts you through boot camp style workouts.  I go Mon-Wed-Fri at 5:30 am.  This is my second session, however I did not complete my first, I dropped out around wk 4 due to illness- that was October.  In October I was running and exercising and going 90 miles an hour feeling great!  Then I hit a wall that lasted about a month.  By the time I recovered it was Thanksgiving then Christmas.  I just decided it would be a good thing for me to take a two month break.  Today... I feel like someone has beat me with a baseball bat.  Everything hurts and I cant lift my arms to wash my hair.  Did I mention I went back for a 5:30 am strength this morning.  What was I thinking?!  I could not contain or control some of the noise that came from my mouth.  I HURT.  Oh, and then I met Holley at 10.  Needless to say my motivation by that time was lacking, my girls had a good time though.  Addison was so excited to play with her 'friends' and the nursery ladies inquired about where I had been...oh my.  Boot camp again in the morning.  Why am I pushing so hard?  Because I can!  and I know my body now!  I know I will not die. and. my weight.  I literally put on  30.4 pounds since I 'took a break'.  The scales dont lie.  I kept weighing in right up to October.  It baffles me and angers me.  I was SO CLOSE to being a year 'clean and sober', because food is an addiction, and it just poof! vanished in a few short months.

So what I am telling myself now when the pain catches me, or my tired butt doesnt want to get out of bed is this- "I hope that Doughnut was worth it Big Girl"  Everything is permissable, BUT not everything is beneficial... Did I think it would go this far? Nope, not at all.  Am I giving up? Nope, not at all.  I lost focus, I wasnt submerged in my Bible and I disconnected.  Guess what... Im baaaack. :)  Bring it on.
James 1:2-4  ² Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, ³ because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. ⁴ Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.  




Now I need a shower.  :)